Volunteering

Yesterday's post has got me thinking about volunteering. I have always wanted to volunteer. It is a part of my value system to want to give. There are so many ways to volunteer, you just have to have time to give and you could choose almost anything.

My first such experience was in high school, when I started to volunteer at Long Lake Animal Hospital in Tampa, FL. At the time, I still harbored dreams of becoming a veterinarian, so this was the perfect opportunity to gain some valuable knowledge and experience. I had a super time. At first, I just followed the veterinarian, Dr. Hong, around as he performed his daily duties. My first actual contribution was to disinfect the exam table after each client. Quickly, I assumed the role of receptionist, going out to greet clients as they arrived and telling them it wouldn't be long and wouldn't they take a seat? I liked to do this. It went well with my smiling personality and I was happy to be useful, since Dr. Hong didn't have to interrupt his work whenever the bell announced someone at the door. When there was an especially busy Saturday, I would spend my time between the reception and the back room where I gave flea baths to cats, dogs and even to Baby the ferret. :o) Eventually, I learned to take stool samples and to check blood samples for parasites with the microscope.

In the end, I never did become a veterinarian because when I got to university, I realized that Physics and Chemistry at that level were not for me, not to mention Organic Chemistry! Since I liked both children and animals, I decided to become a teacher instead. Still, my experience at Long Lake Animal hospital taught me a very good work ethic. I learned to be punctual, professional, courteous and hard-working, all of which have stayed with me ever since.

When I got married and my husband, who moved to Canada from Hungary, needed to learn English so he could find a job, I looked into some volunteering opportunities for him. I thought that helping the Meals on Wheels program would be great for him. He likes history and I thought it would be interesting for him to meet and talk with elderly people. I was in for a big surprise. My husband was shocked that I would consider asking him to volunteer. He wasn't going to do any free work for anybody. The idea made him angry and he was really indignant that he wasn't going to do anything for free. He didn't even consider the benefit of being surrounded by English-speakers and how that would help him. He was too proud to volunteer and he wouldn't let me either. When I thought of something that I would like to do, he told me to ask to be paid for it, otherwise not to waste my time on it. 

'Nuff said about that.

When I left my husband in 2007, volunteering was still on my mind and a part of my values, but as a mother raising three children alone, I didn't have any time to give. Eventually, though, starting in 2008, my husband and I shared custody of the kids and that left me with every second week with nothing much to do at home. I wasn't used to being all alone. So what happened was that I started listening to my old cd's and tapes again. (Mostly cd's - I made the switch from lp's and tapes to cd's at that time - a leap ahead for me, technologically! lol When most people were already on to mp3's...) Next thing I knew, I became aware of more and more of my favorite bands touring and coming to the National Capital Region. I didn't really have money to be going to concerts left and right, despite the fact that I had a lot of time, and eventually it dawned on me that if I volunteered, I might get to see some of my favorite bands perform live for free. That is what lead me to volunteer for BluesFest.

I worked in the BluesFest Outdoor Blues Café in 2008 and 2009 and got to see all the shows for free between shifts. It was a pretty good experience, but I gave it up once I got the kids back after they spend a year in Hungary with their dad. Since then, I have been with them full-time and haven't had the time to give to BluesFest, but I'm not complaining. I'd much rather be with my kids, and BluesFest isn't the sort of festival where my kids can tag along with me on my volunteering shifts.

The Ottawa Folk Festival turned out to be a very good, family-oriented place for me to volunteer. I've been with them for three years now, this summer will be the fourth, and for the past two years the kids have come with me to the festival. I am really happy about this for several reasons: first, because they also get to benefit from hearing the shows. I'm not standing there alone singing along any more, my kids are by my side. It's great. Also, the kids know that I am volunteering (i.e. working for free), so this is a way for me to transmit my values to them. I am VERY happy about that. Thirdly, since the kids seem to enjoy the festival atmosphere and they also seem to think that the things I do as a volunteer are fun (I've been on the Visual Arts and EnviroDish crews), I hope that when they are old enough, they will choose to volunteer as well. That would be a proud day for me. (Like the day we all participated in the City of Gatineau's Spring Cleaning Event.)

In the meantime, I will continue to volunteer and to let the kids know about it. If nothing else, I will be a good role model for them. (Although I truly can't say "if nothing else", since I have reaped so many benefits from volunteering!)

I Seem To Have Money On My Mind A Lot Lately

Tonight I managed to sell the spare Nintendo 3DS that we had bought for my younger son to replace the one that he had "lost" which ended up being not lost, so now we had two. (Yes, I am rather fond of run-on sentences, although I am not as good at composing them as Lemony Snicket, who is an expert run-on sentence composer, unlike myself, who am not as good at it as he, Lemony Snicket, is.) ;)

I am proud to say that I resisted temptation and did not make a profit on this sale. We had originally bought the game for $100 and that is how much I sold it for tonight. So we came out even.

Money does not have a good track record as far as staying in my pocket is concerned. As I have posted previously, my first son really DID lose his Nintendo by taking it to school and having it stolen. So that one still has to be replaced, not to console my misbehaving son, but to spare the feelings of his grandparents, who gave him the game and would be very hurt to find out that he had taken such bad care of it.

So this $100 will go towards buying him a Nintendo that I may or may not forbid him to ever touch. :o)

Luckily, I have also managed to sell Daughter's horseback riding pants and boots, so the money for the second Nintendo, which should cost about $120 if the person selling it ever replies to my emails, has been secured.

I must say I will be relieved to have this whole episode behind us. I still remember how panicked I felt when I thought of telling my parents that the boys had lost their birthday gifts. Worse yet, I am still not sure that I dealt with this situation in the right way. I recognize that in essence I am shielding the boys from the consequences of their actions. Am I protecting them in order to spare my parents' feelings, or to hide the fact that I am an inadequate mother whose parenting skills are sorely lacking and whose sons disobeyed her and were not responsible enough with the expensive gifts that they received? Truth be told, it is a little of both. I would be ashamed to tell my parents what really happened. I am going to these great lengths to replace the Nintendo both for my boys' sakes and for mine.

Hopefully this chapter will soon be closed and I can get on with life, with a little less money in my pockets, but also minus some of the guilt.

The Human Brain - It Works!

Last week when I was writing about how I prepared my presentation for university, my daughter took an interest in what I was typing. I reminded her of something I had shared with her previously, about how amazing our brains were, and she decided to try it out. This morning, she came and told me that she tried it and it has worked for her twice in a row. I think it is something you all can try, and share it with your kids too. It is a great self-esteem builder. An amazing "Look what I can do!"

This is a mind exercise that one of my university professors told us about in class. I encouraged my students to try it out when I was student-teaching a grade five class. The children reported back to me almost immediately that it works.

Here is the trick:

At night, when you go to bed, think about what time you would like to wake up. My recommendation is that you think about the time five minutes before your alarm clock is supposed to wake you. For example, if you wake up at 6 am, like I do, think in your head that tomorrow morning you want to wake up at 5:55. If you concentrate on this before going to sleep, you will wake up at 5:55. It's as simple as that!

I don't know how this works, really, as my knowledge of the human brain is very limited. I can't fathom how our brains can keep track of time while we are sleeping, with out eyes closed. (I assume this is the case, unless you are Gandalf, who sleeps with his eyes open!) Obviously we are not looking at the glowing numbers of our alarm clocks, so how do we know when it is 5:55, and how can we program ourselves to wake up at that precise moment? I can't explain the mechanics of it, but the simple how is: just think about it, and it will happen. When I was a student teacher, almost every child in my class told me that it worked for them by the end of the week. It was an amazing way to teach them that they really could do anything they set their mind to.

I think it is important to remind myself that I can trust in my brain, especially now, with all the memory problems I have been having. It is daunting to think that I will start university in the fall with a brain that is not functioning at full capacity. I really do want to wean myself off the meds by september, but of course that decision will ultimately be based on what my doctor recommends, based on my blood tests, etc. In the meantime, I think it is important to remind myself that I am intelligent person and that my brain has already gotten me through university once. I obtained my BA in Education with flying colors at that, so I have to trust that I will be able to succeed in Translation also.

If you are prone to moments of doubt, I suggest that you try out this Human Alarm Clock exercise and prove to yourself just how wonderful your brain really is.

If you are a parent, showing this trick to your child(ren) can help to teach responsibility. Wouldn't it be great to avoid the hassle of trying to coax a grumpy, sleepy child from under the covers? What parent doesn't wish their child would wake up on time and on their own? I'm going to tell Second Son to try this out tonight. He is the one who has the most difficulty waking up. Why didn't I think of this before? Live and learn!

Crazy Day Today

We are leaving tonight for a friend's cottage on the Bonnechere River near Eganville, Ontario. We'll spend 3 nights and 3 days there, hopefully relaxing. :o)

The crazy part, of course, is getting ready to go. We have to get packed.

Show of hands: How many of you have tackled the task of packing for four people while the two youngest of your brood unpack every bag to see if they can find their pocket knives?

Anyone?

Anyone...?

Well, I seem to be alone in my predicament. That's too bad. I was hoping for some advice.

The only way I can cope with the frustration is to take a time out and write today's blog post.

The pocket knives were souvenirs from Québec City last year. They are like swiss army knives, with different tools in them like scissors and screw drivers. They will be handy for sharpening sticks to roast marshmallows and hot dogs on, but I do not want the boys playing with them in the house. The reason I hid them in the first place was that they became weapons when the boys got in an argument. At that point, I decided they were not mature enough to have them.

This weekend, I will try to let them have the pocket knives and see if they can be responsible with them. The problem is, First Son asked me to pack them for the trip and as soon as I said that I already had, both boys started looking for them. That is very annoying, when everything in the bags was nicely folded and rolled. To my credit, though, they have not managed to unearth the knives. I hid them that well. *smug smile*

We still have to eat lunch, take Second Son to gymnastics, during which I have to do groceries, then we have to have supper, pack the car, go to cake decorating class (a special class for the boys to decorate Easter cakes), and we leave for the cottage from there. Somewhere between all of that I have to fit in the time to go get the cottage keys. Oh, and I also may get a call from the person who wants to buy our spare blue Nintendo for $100. Like I said, Crazy Day. I had better get back to it.

I'm sorry that today's post is so short. I don't know if I will have time to get online before next Wednesday, so I would like to wish everyone a very happy Easter if you celebrate it, and a lovely weekend to all even if you don't.

Take care,

Enikő
xxx